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The magpies have a naughty list

  • Oct 11
  • 2 min read

There's a naughty list

Kept by the watchers

Not equated to

Chrissie presents


But you won't know you're on it

Until you met by

An angry

Ball of feathers


Because out there

Someone has you pegged

Despite probably nothing

You've done


You just look like

A bad egg

from their past...

So now you better run


At least Santa gives you

The benefit of doubt

To reset on

A yearly basis


But the other has

No truck with that

And keeps a file for years

Of faces


As many as thirty-

That's you and your dopples

And twenty-nine other

Poor types


Waltzing along in

Your merry daze

Before your avenger

Side-swipes


It could just be that

You have the same hair

Or have the same

Logo on your jacket


But who has time

To say if past baddies

Were you?

Let's just attack it


People have swung by a tree

after years

in which magpies

Have not bothered a soul


Only to find themselves

Dive-bombed again

As they were in

Times of old


When they're sure they

Never did a thing

To wound

Those precious birds


But somehow they've

Been singled out

As the one

Who must be spurned


Still, when was the last time

Someone scaled a gum

To hassle

A bunch of chicks


Not since Ginger Meggs

I'd say

So maggies,

Pick on the kids


A bit funny

But with a grain of truth

If you're aged

Ten to thirty


The birds have a bone

to pick with youth

That's why their glare's

So dirty


Yet, of all the study

And ornithology

That's gone into

Answering why


The answer they've found

To stop being hounded

Is as easy

As earthworm pie


Make friends with them-

Really,

That's what's

Been concluded

From the science

And the theses


Show them that you're kind

Give them the piece of mind

That you're the better

Of your species


Spare the helmet

With googly eyes

And the bike horn

That sounds like a ship


Because, given their memories

It won't be just you

But your grandkids

Getting the...



Addendum:


I'm not saying don the shirt of your political rival

and make an ass of yourself under a tree

but if it's by a school that run polling booths

you didn't hear the suggestion from me


Research:








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